i am a first born…
aka…
i am self-critical, strong-willed, and stubborn.

it is hard for me
to loose control,
to ask for help,
to admit i need others.

which is exactly why i must
be reminded i am not in control,
learn humility by asking for help,
experience life by needing others.

thank you all for helping me live these lessons and limping along side of me.

to mark the quarter of our year together,
we have begun selling our photographs online.
buy me… 3-see…
go ahead… take a looksee.
http://www.3-see.com/looksee

somedays, i feel stronger than others, and it’s usually on the days i wear black. what is it about being clothed in this color that makes me feel more confident, more in control, more secure? color theory tells me black is associated with power, elegance, formality, death, evil, and mystery. maybe the theory is actually fact.

note to self:
if ever you come across an electrical cord in the future which has seen a little too much wear… don’t plug it in. it just might make a big popping noise, flash a bright blue light, sever itself and the point of explosion, and leave behind black rubber lines on your fingers.

yeah… how about you not do that again.

i know now.
the email came today.
it wasn’t what i wanted,
it wasn’t what i hoped for…
no reason, no explanation.
just a simple statement…
you have not been accepted.
are you sure?
the university must have emailed me on accident.
uc berkeley…
a master’s of architecture…
environmental design
in the developing world…
doesn’t the program know
i was made for it
and it was made for me?
this wasn’t supposed to happen.

sometimes, when God closes a door,
it’s because He wants you to step out,
to risk…
and climb through the window.

what will i find?
how will i get there?
i don’t know…
but i trust.

personal history statement
statement of purpose
portfolio

………………………..
www.3-see.com

everyone dances. some in steamy night clubs, others a grand plié on the horizontal bar. perhaps you skillfully avoid the cracks as you’re walking to work or maybe you spin around in your apartment when nobody’s watching. someway or another, you find a way to physically express an internal feeling, you bring to life dreams of silent rhythm, you move in a way only you can move. as for me? i like to dance on the soccer field.

i haven’t played outdoor soccer since college, but that’s what’s amazing when you learn to dance your dance, it’s like riding a bike. okay, so maybe i’m a little more winded… er… a lot winded… after 20 minutes of playing [how on earth did i play for 90 min without a sub in high school?!], and maybe i don’t have the finesse i once had on corner kicks. but when you find your dance, the skill matters less and the passion matters more.

i slipped my cleats again and sighed… oh, how my feet have missed you! the worn leather becomes an extension of my foot, a layer to my skin. the memory of the laces, the color of the sole… yes, i love wearing my black heels. and yes, new balance 760’s are my favorite. but nothing, i repeat, nothing, will ever replace my dancing shoes… it’s like dreaming with my feet.