the rain falls. its been falling all day and all night and all day again. the air, once hot and stale, now sends goosebumps up my arms and smells fresh. or at least as fresh as air in india can smell. the ground is saturated and standing pools of water are everywhere. watch your step. the green parots seek shelter from the wetness by floating from quava tree to quava tree finding their breakfast and entertaining me as i eat mine.

i find my shelter from the rain on the porch, sitting on the three legged bench, hoping it doesn’t fall while munching on my peanutbutter’ed toast and sipping my mug of nescafe. my two weeks in india are coming to a close and i wonder where they went and how they passed so quickly. in the busyness of going and doing, i have found little time to sit and reflect. that’s not what i had planned. i needed to return to a place where i found clarity, i needed to go back to the mountains of india. in their presence i had to unwind and shed the layers of distraction from this year in san francisco. i needed to step outside the city i’m trying to call home and away from its people to gain perspective…and just as i finally feel the weight fall and i stop fighting the battles of the day, my time has come to a close. just as I’m ready to embrace the stillness, i find it slipping between my fingers.

nearly two years ago, i stepped out of the door at the dehli airport recognizing the significance of the moment. i knew somehow my life would never be the same. at that moment, i became an international citizen, aware of the small role i played in the global story which to which i was being introduced for the first time. when i left, i was thankful for the experience and my time in that land, but i didn’t know if or when i would ever be back. i didn’t know if this chaotic indian world had any more room for me or if i’d want to fill it even if it did. but as i stepped into the plane this time to leave india, i took one last glance out to the sky and felt the peace. somehow, i know i’ll be back.

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