some girls always seem to have a man in their life…
as for me, i’d like to think there’s always been a running path in mine.

i don’t think either of us intentionally look for this constant presence our lives.
they’re simply predisposed to the male gender and i to open spaces.

and although there are many blatantly obvious differences between a tall, dark, handsome man and a winding, gravel path… i also believe there are many internal similarities we, the female gender, seems to be searching for. and at least for the purposes of this post, the ‘man’ in my life, aka ‘running path’ shall now be referred to as ‘he’, ‘him’, or ‘his’. [sorry men; this is not intended at all to compare you to trampled roads or manicured lawns...just one of my random musings so read on and humor me for a moment]

he first caught my attention in high school. i was captain of the varsity soccer team and decided such title required my fitness to step up to a new level of responsibility. it was my senior year and i left school two hours before everyone else did and two and a half hours before soccer practice began. sometimes i would spend the extra time lounging on the couch with a bowl of cereal and reruns of saved by the bell. but most of the time, i’d spend it with him. we’d meet up for a run in the neighborhood adjacent to mine. during those pre warm-ups and he challenged me to a level i didn’t think was possible and taught me to enjoy the discipline. halfway through our run, we crossed the wooden bridge over the water and would pause; that was our special place. he’d whisper in the trees and ripple over the water; i’d close my eyes and enjoy the moment. i’ve returned to that place many times since those first years together because he seems to understand; one time i went to let someone go, another time in trust again. now i go because it’s familiar and sometimes familiar is all i need him to be.

i met another in college though i never imagined i’d find him in a cemetery. just a half a mile from my house, i used to escape with him to decompress from a day in class and to prepare myself for another night in studio. some might say he has an eerie feeling, but i found him full of life. nowhere else could i go and be more reminding me of how alive i was when everyone around me was not. as i’d read the inscriptions and thought of the families behind the stones, he challenged me to live life more fully. i’d return to studio refreshed and revived; the bigger picture of life in mind as i turned my attention towards projects which mattered little. he had a way of helping me put things in perspective, letting the urgent move aside to make room for the important. i needed someone to remind me.

in india, he was my favorite part of the day. a figure eight, he’d take me by an expansive view of the himalayas and then along the edge of the valley. every morning, no matter how warm or cold, he’d meet me on the edge of the driveway and we’d watch the day begin together. he and i, we sorted through a lot of things on those loops; he pushed me to be real and honest with myself when few others could understand or were too far away to ask. sometimes, i he just let me cry… and he knew sometimes that’s all a girl needs to do. he didn’t try to fix things, we’d sit on the concrete bench and bask in the creation. that really was all i needed. i wonder if i’ll ever find another like him in a more beautiful place… i highly doubt it.

and now, there’s a new man in my life. even though i barely know him, i realized his presence has been missing in this california chapter. it wasn’t until i found an apartment, let life settle, and had the confidence to go out and explore did i fall in love with him in san francisco. even bigger than new york’s central park, he twists and turns more than any of the others i’ve previously enjoyed. there is excitement and exploration on my journey with him as we pass the roller rink, by the de yong museum, and over the waterfall. we haven’t spent much time together, but already i know he’s does something none of the others could… he leads me to the ocean. after 4 miles together, he spills me out into the sand and let’s me sit in full view of the crashing waves. he knows what i didn’t, i’ve been landlocked all my life, and he’s helped to break me free. he might be jealous when i begin sailing lessons or buy my wet suit for surfing or when the sun sets later than a run will allow. but rest assured, my new found path, i’m not going anywhere and i’m glad you’re not leaving me either.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 26th, 2007 at 4:47 pm and is filed under . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.